One.

Just let things go.
Be brave and hold on.
It's going to be better soon...

Arghh, I've heard this so many times… Through my personal growth of struggling with anxiety and depression, I found out that some things will turn out to be okay in the end eventually.

Yes, sometimes - even though it's really damn hard - it's better to let things, thoughts or people go so you don't have to focus on negative energy. And yet still… at this very moment, I'm struggling and fighting against my own dark thoughts due to things that happend to me in life.

It feels like there's this big massive hole in my heart. Empty. Numb. Lonely. Haunted by the thought that I won't ever be good enough. As a mom, as a partner, as a friend. Terrorized by the frustration and disappointment in people and their behavior. Anxious about what the future might bring. Scared to even dare to think about a future at all. Feeling like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. Like I am the only one to blame when things go wrong.

These days, I'm living my darkest days. I am surviving. But I'm still here. Breathing. Auto-pilot. I can feel myself sorry for that. But then I'd feel sorry for who I am.
And there's no reason to feel sorry about that...

In a world full of influencers, there still isn't anyone who inspires me enough to rise up and fight against this feeling. I have to do this myself. I'll stop by once in a while to share some thoughts, memories, dreams, goals, music or inspiration over here. We'll see where this will lead to... Anyhow, for now, small steps and no expectations.

With love,

A. xoxo